I’ve bought the books, cleared the calendar, and paid the tuition, so now the only thing standing between me and Building Construction Technology class is the perfect outfit. Somebody mentioned “blue collared shirt and jeans,” and when I peeked in on the class in progress, I did see a few blue shirts with collars. I can do that, but jeans are a little trickier. As far as I am concerned, jeans are not one-size-fits-all; they are not even one-size-fits-all-of-me. My legs and gut were not meant for the same pair of trousers. I’m not saying that in a do-these-pants-make-my-butt-look-big kind of way. It’s just an architectural-dimensional observation.

And if there is anything that is going to make shop class difficult for me, it is pants that wear like tourniquets on my thighs and a hula hoop around my waist.

Overalls would be a good solution, in theory, but as previously discussed, I looked like Ralph from Green Acres, if someone had failed to change Ralph’s sagging Huggies.

“What about leggings?” you ask. “Or yoga pants?”

Well, now I’m just sad.

What if I designed some stretch overalls? I’d need to take a sewing class first. And now I’m back on the slippery slope of taking classes to prepare for the classes that I need to figure out what to be when I grow up.

On the other hand, that’s exactly the kind of DIY thinking that landed me in a building technology class in the first place, so I know I’m on the right path. All I need is some pants.